Dirtman Cometh

"We're Going to be a Classy Restaurant"

2011-12-14T13:10:00.003-05:00

That's what SisIggy informed me this morning when we were discussing the soon-to-be opening of the family's new coffee shop/cafe in nearby Romney, WV. Her comment was to my question whether we'd be selling or at least serving Red Beet Eggs to our customers.

You've all seen them. If not, I have included a photo here. So I guess if I get a craving I will have to visit a buffet salad bar for my fix.

Here's an Article I Am Extremely Proud

2009-09-16T08:47:00.003-04:00

Because it's about dogs; a young lady that shows a lot of promise, and because SisIg bailed me out and helped me with the re-write.

The Animal Lives Again

2009-09-08T13:26:00.004-04:00

Two days ago SisIggy asked if I would look at our Dyson vacuum and see why it wasn't working anymore. She told me, I turned it off when I began smelling rubber burning. She also said the suction wasn't very good either.

I finally had time this morning to investigate the problem.

Our model -- appropriately called The Animal -- as it is designed to handle dog hair (which those in the know, know we have six of them), was sitting on the living room carpet. I took a quarter to open the screws on the face cover and found dog hair (what's new) tightly wound around the beater. Interwoven with the hair was purple yarn, remnants of Sis' many knitting projects. The yarn, apparently, was also interwoven around the rubber belt that connects the beater with the motor.
Two hours later, I had it apart, the beater cleaned and everything back in place. I called SisIg to let her know that it now worked and that I had finished vacuuming. She then told me, I saw the yarn and thought I had gotten all of it.

Most of it, I replied.

As for the lack of suction, I found a slightly bent back felt pen wedged in one of the purple attachments that allows one to remove objects that shouldn't be sucked off the floor. It now runs just like new.

This posting, which reflects good news around here is also for the benefit of IH, who refuses to pay what a Dyson costs in favor of a less-expensive vacuum that when it breaks you throw it away and buy another.

Our four-plus year old Animal is as good as new.

It Kinda Looks Like Me

2009-09-08T12:12:00.001-04:00

I can't do it justice so I will just link it here.

The Battle of Toms Brook Re-Visited

2009-09-08T10:10:00.003-04:00

In October, 1864 the Battle of Toms Brook raged on in the fields surrounding my house. That battle became significant once again yesterday when Independent Hill and her husband, who live across the road from me, decided it was time to replace their front porch.

Some say the house wasn't built until after The War Between the States (that's what we southerners call it) but since no one is around now who was there then... we'll let our little story continue.

IH told me last night all that was found under the wooden porch were a couple broken jars, a hook of some type and the partial remains of a cat. But the rumor now swirling the neighborhood is that the remains of an Union officer was found buried under the concrete steps. We further understand that's why the steps remain today.

Could George Custer have been killed here instead of Little Big Horn? No one will know for sure but IH could be re-writing history.

WGO: Newspaper Slag for What's Going On

2009-09-07T22:27:00.000-04:00

It's been awhile since I have posted here and the reason is simple: After having been under-employed for much of 2009 I landed a job in late August and have been working non-stop since.

Tonight, as I type this, I look forward to my first day off since beginning work. I will be resting for much of the day but do have several cosmetic around-the-house type things planned. And I will also be covering three girls volleyball matches later in the day for my moonlighting job I got in early September.

Now I hate volleyball but like the cash that I'll get, so I will learn to like it just a little bit.

Bon Voyage

2009-08-24T23:00:00.002-04:00

It was with sadness this evening that the box of tomatoes (left) decided to move a few miles down the road to live with a new family.

Wait. What am I saying. I was actually jumping with joy as I carried the 40-pound box to Carol's car.

I was even happy when she emailed me later tonight with the news they found their way into pint jars and had been pressured into a winter foodstuff.

Unfortunately, our county fair starts later this week for a nine-day run and Carol and her husband Dale have a booth, meaning no more of the red vermin will be heading south for almost a fortnight.

In the meantime, the aunts, uncles and cousins of these pesky fruit will be once again overflowing our kitchen, house and yard.

Oh, well. When SisIggy asks me to plant tomatoes next year, hopefully I will remember not to plant 40 plants. I am sure 10 will be enough.

Salsa Time

2009-08-23T20:18:00.000-04:00

Trying to winnow down our over-producing tomato stock today, I decided to make homemade salsa. Fortunately, we had all the ingredients on hand and I bought the Mason Jars Saturday night.

I started with the tomatoes - some yellow, some red, some German and a few Heritage ones thrown in for good measure. About the only thing that didn't go into the mix were the grape tomatoes.

I began by dicing them into small rectangular pieces and then bringing it to a boil for five minutes.

Next I cleaned and food processed five onions, diced cilantro and jalapeno peppers from the garden and prepped the jars by washing, scalding and then holding in the oven at 200 degrees until needed.

After tossing some salt into the mix and stirrring all to beat hell, I began adding everything but the hot stuff into the jars -- first, three Mild jars and then six Medium (peppers) and finally, three HOT (peppers and the seeds).

All that was left was boiling the filled jars for 10 minutes each and applying the labels so I wouldn't give a Hot one to someone who only liked Mild...

Who Said the Dog Days Are Boring?

2009-08-22T23:30:00.002-04:00

Whoever said the Dog Days of August are boring never experienced one in Dirtmanland.

In fact, it's been hectic here since returning for our annual clamming operation in late July. So much so I have been unable to post anything here.

The garden and grass-cutting chores took a bulk of my time as I picked a ton of tomatoes. Some of it went for a fresh salsa made for Heir I's birthday bash; we tried every recipe that involved the fruit and made some up too. We forced maters on whomever showed up at the door and even tried to sell or give them away from a make-shift stand in the front yard.

Heir I's party wasn't until August 8th and according to SisIg's Facebook page, it will continue for another two weeks. Oh, to be young again.

Being sick of cucumbers and having pickled more than I'd like to remember, the neighborhood celebrated when I picked the last and pulled the vines last week.

I also started applying for jobs as several interesting prospects began appearing in the local papers but none came to fruition. Heir I, meanwhile, landed a job in Winchester, Sis, one in Woodstock and Heir II finished his year-long job in Strasburg as he finished packing for his trip to Salem to begin his post-high school academics this week at Roanoke College.

Sis and I took him Saturday, bidding him farewell in the parking lot that evening and I cried the better part of the trip home.

Sunday dawned to a sunny sky and more maters and after picking 40 pounds (which Heir I's better half's mother claimed), I decided I would attempt to make salsa to keep my mind off Heir I.

I think I succeeded.

What Happened to the Neighbors?

2009-07-25T20:23:00.002-04:00

Got back from the beach a few hours ago and finally had time to check out the garden. I had asked the neighbors to help themselves this past week but it doesn't look like they did -- I found two zucchini the size of New Jersey, a bushel of cukes (we gave away all we had before the trip and even more to Dark that wasn't used on the trip). I also picked a dozen plum tomatoes and could have picked a dozen banana peppers and several large green peppers had I had containers to carry them to the house.

Also saw the collards are coming along nicely, we need to harvest more lettuce, and the onions and radishes are about ready. I also need to tie up the tomato and cuke vines in a hurry or we won't be able to see what's ripe.

My dad had told me the tomatoes weren't ripening because the nights have been too cool. I believe the coming week may change that...

What Is It?

2009-07-15T13:53:00.003-04:00

I've been watching this mature for the past several weeks and finally got around to taking a photo of it.

Post what you think it best represents. We'll pick it Friday, by the way and take with us when we visit Dark Garden's temporary digs. Don't know it it will be admired or eaten.

It's Finally Over And I Don't Want to See Another Dogperson for 362 Days

2009-07-13T07:53:00.003-04:00

The past week has been a harried experience, travelling from Dirtmanland to Berryville for our kennel club's annual dog shows. It all began Thursday when we prepared the grounds for the show followed by more cleanup activities Friday.

SisIg, who's the trophy chair, and I left the abode before daybreak Saturday and Sunday for the drive, arriving before 7 each morning. We parted, as I had to get everything set up that couldn't be done the day before. For some reason or other I have been Grounds Chair for the past four years meaning I do whatever no one else in the club is willing to do.

Armed only with a golf cart and an occasional assistant, I move from one end of the 27-acre fairground to the other. Sometimes, I have to move equipment. At other's it's to provide direction to someone and then, a call goes out that one of the judges needs a ride and off I go again.

Each night we arrived home and were too tired to do anything else but sleep. Last night, I dozed in my chair for several hours; then went to bed where I awoke at 3:30 am and couldn't get back to sleep.

Oh well. I should be plenty rested for the next shows - scheduled July 10-11, 2010. But there will be plenty of work to do in the meantime.

Where Were You on 070709?

2009-07-07T15:53:00.002-04:00

I'll always remember where I was when I heard Kennedy was dead (home, right after getting out of primary school); when Reagan was shot (teaching school; told not to tell the kids so as not to upset them); and now, where I wasn't when Michael Jackson was eulogized.

The answer to that was as far away from it and the tube as possible.

He and I may have shared the last name but that's as close as it will ever be. I never could sing like him; dance like him or perform the moonwalk like him. I also never touched a kid like he was accused of touching and that's a good thing.

I was joking with SisIg this morning that today was Jackson's Epiphany, ie., the 12th day following his death. It has taken Michael Jackson's family longer to bury him than it took to bury Ronnie Reagan and Jerry Ford combined. And now it looks like his funeral will also be a governmental-paid affair too -- unless Jackson's fans pony up to the bar and send in a contribution to the city of Los Angeles.

Lord knows they could use it.

Big Broken Toe Taken Down By Popular Demand

2009-07-03T00:02:00.001-04:00

Dark Garden, SisIggy, Older than Dirt, the Heirs and now Independent Hill has spoken and I decided to take down Friday's Blog but will leave the comments for posterity. It had the effect I wanted.

Cucumbers Anyone?

2009-07-02T00:15:00.001-04:00

SisIggy has her plethora of baking blogs and I, my gardening ones.

I should have posted this Wednesday but didn't want to take away from Gwynne's milestone. Tuesday afternoon I found four cucumbers ready to be picked (the day before, by the way, they were nonexistent -- or at least I didn't see them on the vines.

I also picked three more banana peppers and with a store-bought Vidalia onion (ours aren't ready yet), Sis made a fantastic cucumber salad.

Now Sis will tell ya she could have made it even better by adding a generous amount of dill on it (which we also have growing in our herb garden).

But I don't like it that way and she was gracious enough to accommodate me for which I profusely say thanks.

1,500th Hit: Gwynne's the Winner*

2009-07-01T08:09:00.004-04:00

Tuesday was a red banner day here at Dirtmanland as The Dirtymon registered his 1,500th hit to the site. The Dirtymon doesn't have the readership of say, SisIggy -- which many would say is a good thing; nor the strangeness of those who read Dark Garden.

The Dirtymon appreciates all the readers he has though. Hits were slow in the beginning when we first began filing posts last fall. It picked up a bit during the winter when friends from Bits and Pieces began flocking to the site and even more so when we joined Facebook and began getting many of Sis' and DG friends here.

Based on SiteMeter, the milestone was made yesterday evening when our good friend Gwynne popped on for a review. Thank you Gwynne and thanks to everyone else who makes this site a part of your daily ritual.

*As with Fire - our 1,000th hit - there is no actual prize except our humble apology for making this dirt-poor site a winner.

Moon Shot

2009-06-30T22:55:00.001-04:00

It was partly cloudy tonight but the moon did all it could to show itself in the sky. I love it when I can take so fantastic shots with the digital camera (especially when neighbors don't have their outdoor lights marring the viewscape.

Now I admit Jag or SisIggy has anything to worry about when it comes to all things photography. But now that I have found the sports feature on the camera and with a somewhat shake-less hand, one can sometimes get a neat shot:
This one is either telling me the Milky Way is out there somewhere or Minnie Mouse has a new moniker.

The Week in Review

2009-06-28T10:22:00.008-04:00

This has been the most prolific week around Dirtmanland in a long time.

Monday, I got up early, found myself wanting caffeine and drank three cups of coffee (my usual consumption is one cup. Before I knew it, I had done eight loads of laundry (including putting it all away instead of dumping it on the sofa for SisIg to do. I also stripped the bed and remade it, dusted and vacuumed the entire house and shuffled the dogs in and out.

Tuesday I started working on the new gate for the chain-linked fence that John Boy and I had built last year. If you will recall, our landlord didn't buy a gate then and we had to resort to a temporary fix - using a portable dog pen to keep the terriers and aussies at bay.

After four hours of trying to get the cemented posts out so we could re-set them, I called in reinforcements (John Boy) for Wednesday.

Wednesday morning I picked veggies from the Victory Garden for the first time (Black-Seeded Simpson and Romaine lettuce, four white onions, two radish and one six-inch long banana pepper).

Once JB got here, we tackled the two posts (going from a five foot gate to an eight-footer). We finally extracted them, dug new holes and reset each in a Portland cement / sand mixture. We then waited a day for them to properly set and enjoyed the salad Sis made from the garden produce along with a very fine dinner.

On Thursday we finished re-stretching the chain link fence, installing the gate which, by the way was a section of a dog kennel our landlord had lying around his property. What's cool is it is now a gate within a gate. We can open the door or the gate, depending on what we need to move from one side to the other.

With the gate in place, Salt and Pode can now enjoy being outside in a secure shaded pen -- if we can live with the constant yapping that's so annoying to everyone around us.

Afterwards, we had another great meal.

Friday I worked in the garden trying to train the cucumbers onto the fence I had installed, tied up more tomato vines and, while waiting to get the neighbor's roto-tiller, I mowed the entire yard. Then I went shopping for food and supplies.

The tiller was finally available on Saturday morning and two hours later I headed to the shower to get cleaned up before Sis and I sojourned to Dark Garden and family for an excellent outing and cookout.

Thanks to Dark and the Mrs. for a lovely summer sojourne!

The week upcoming will also be busy. I need to dig a trench to bury the sump pump discharge line; I need to apply grass clippings on the garden now that it's tilled and I am hoping, beyond hope some real work will show up.

And I'm hoping your week will be fruitful too.

This Just In

2009-06-27T12:31:00.014-04:00

Table game foe now endorses idea at racetrack

SHENANDOAH JUNCTION, W.Va. (AP) -- A West Virginia House of Delegates member once opposed to table games at Charles Town Races is now endorsing the idea.

During a public forum last week, Jefferson County Democrat John Doyle said it's time for county voters to endorse table games at the track.

Doyle says he changed his mind after lawmakers approved legislation during the recent special session that increased the amount of money going to counties where the games are played. Five cities would also receive an increased share from gambling proceeds.

Jefferson County voters rejected table games at the track in 2007, partly on Doyle's urging.

Track officials have yet to decide when they will go back to voters, but Doyle said he will endorse their efforts.

This press release (above) may not mean much to most, but for John Boy, it may mean the world.

I found this article (and before anyone accuses me of making it up, I can produce the newspaper I lifted it from) and immediately thought of our famed relative who's a recent honors graduate of the New Jersey School of Gaming.

What it means is John Boy might be able to land a job in the short term rather than long term if the fine citizens of Jefferson County, WV, vote favorably for table games in the next general election.

A key roadblock locally was the county wasn't going to get a very big chunk of the profits. Now, after recent legislation in the West Virginia Assembly, the pie got bigger and now the local delegate has reversed his position and favors table games.

So do we.

Numbers Aren't What They're All Cracked Up To Be

2009-06-19T19:01:00.002-04:00

At one time I wanted to have high number of hits on my blog.

Not anymore.

I'll let SisIggy have that honor. She deserves it!

Veggie Tales

2009-06-17T00:05:00.000-04:00

Gardeners, like fishermen, sometimes tell a whopper of a story about how big a vegetable has grown in his garden.

I remember back to when SisIggy and I were dating and how proud I was of a 24-inch long, eight-inch diameter zucchini I had grown in my chicken manure pile. I had been nurturing it for about a week, watering it every day.

Oh I was so proud.

Until Sis took it and tossed it in the trash.

Zucchini should never get more than six inches long, she told me.

Lesson learned.

So to my surprise yesterday when I ventured to the Victory Garden down in the west 40. I was there Monday and saw one onion that would be ready soon; two small green tomatoes and a lot of blooms on the tomato plants; several flowers on the zucchini and cucumber plants.

But no where was there anything on the peppers.

Then Tuesday I found this: A four-inch long sweet bananna pepper.

I got on the cell and called Sis, who was inside the house ranting about VDOT. I asked her to bring the camera to the fence so I could take a few shots proving we somehow managed a green thumb after all.

Sis wasn't content with that, however.

I've seen what you can do with Photoshop, Dirtymon, she said as she fought off the dogs long enough to slide through the barrier.

She arrived at the garden with me and saw for herself. Everyone else will have to see the pics below and trust they are originals and have not been altered.

Besides, would I ever tell a tale?

Goji's Are Berry-Berry Good

2009-06-16T07:44:00.007-04:00

Several weeks ago Heir 2 was rooting around the pantry trying to find some fruit to put on top his trough of cereal. Shortly I heard him ask: What's a GojiBerry?

SisIggy explained it was a dried fruit I had found at the end of one of those display aisles at COSTCO last year. Dirtymon claims they taste like raisins, SisIggy exclaimed.

I was able to chime in that It tastes good with cereal and milk.

The Heir tried it, proclaiming he liked it too, the latter comment bringing a smirk to SisIg's face.

Heir 2 continued eating the berries for several days before reading the label's Best By Date.

These things are out of date, Heir 2 exclaimed as he tossed the remainder of the bag in the trash.

Fortunately, I was close at hand and retrieved said bag. If no one is going to eat them, I would offer them to the birds.

Later that week, when we were running out of suet cakes, I tossed a handful into the feeder. The woodpeckers and assorted other species quickly gobbled them up.

Today, out of cakes again, I filled the hopper and as I type this, I am anxiously awaiting for the first bird to grab a berry and proclaim the gold mine has once again opened.

My only regret is when it is gone, that feeder will be retired until the fall as the suet cakes are expensive and the birds go hog wild with them. The last 2 cakes lasted less than a day!

Dad 1, Vault 0

2009-06-14T09:16:00.004-04:00

My father yesterday battled a 65-plus year-old vault and according to him, the vault had more of a dent than he did.

The vault, found in the bowels of John Handley High School in Winchester, housed priceless artwork from the Corcoran Museum of Art during World War II. It was remembered during the school's recent renovations and through a partnership of several local trusts and the Gallery, reproductions were authorized for a new local gallery to benefit local students and the community.

Dad was there with my mom, as she and her Class of 1949 celebrated its 60th reunion. The current principal gave the class a personal tour of the vault and dad somehow slipped and bashed his noggin on the door.

Several hours - and several interior stitches as well as 15 exterior ones later - dad was good as new and resting comfortable at home. Mom, meanwhile, went to her banquet last night ably assisted by SisIg, who volunteered her services.

Today, we understand, both are on the road attending the final festivities of the Class of 49.

Friday was Heir 2's Moment; Yesterday was Becca's

2009-06-07T11:25:00.001-04:00

As everyone knows, Heir 2's big day was Friday, when he graduated high school.

Saturday, it was time for Sis Ig's and my granddaughter, Becca, who had her first schooling session. Becca will be the closest thing we have to a grandchild for quite some time. Right boys?

Heir 2, Caisee and Bon Voyage

2009-06-06T09:10:00.002-04:00

There are times when others can say it best.

One final thought. Prior to Friday's graduation ceremony I admit I was just a little tiffed that Heir 2 was the only Strasburg High School National Honor Society member that was snubbed on the local scholarship presentations.

But it all became clear when the school presented the listing of all scholarships the graduates earned. Heir 2's acceptance of Roanoke College's prestigious Bittle Scholarship ($117,000 over four years) bested his closest classmate by $37,000 and most by $100,000 or more.

Not bad for an Italian-American / Heinz 57 prodigy who selected academics, senior-year hi jinks and a very talented girlfriend over major athletics, brown-nosing religious zealots and their parents.

We couldn't be more proud of both of you!

Nerdy Graduate

2009-06-05T07:59:00.002-04:00

When all is said and done, this will probably be the least favorite photo in Heir 2's collection. He wanted a letter jacket, but didn't want it. He wouldn't wear it but then he did. For most of his high school career the school letter had more academic awards than athletic ones.

And that's how it should be as fewer people can provide a meal from athletic accomplishments than they can from academic endeavors.

And yet, when we went to the athletic banquet several nights ago, every senior letterperson had their photo taken and displayed against the backdrop of the bleachers. Afterwards, they took them home. For a majority, that night was the highlight of their life.

For Heir 2, it was just one of the final hurdles needed to exit life in Strasburg before heading off to a brand new and exciting world.

I'm proud of you Heir 2, even if it is a dorky, nerdy photo.

Rain, Rain Go Away

2009-06-04T15:47:00.009-04:00

We've been watching the weather maps and rain gauges all week in anticipation of Heir 2's high school graduation tomorrow night. And it's beginning to look like his ceremony and party will both be indoors.*
And that's a shame - especially since SisIg and I have spent the bulk of the past two weeks sprucing up both the yard and the house for the multitudes.

I was hoping I would be able to mow one more time before the festivities began but the grass will just have to keep growing.

Since the last mowing - last Friday - we've had the following amounts of rain:

Saturday - trace
Sunday - 0.5 inches
Monday - none
Tuesday - 0.4 inches
Wedesday - 1.3 inches
Thursday - 1.5 inches

That's 3.7 inches and counting.

According to NOAA, we could have received between 1 and 3 inches Thursday night (we got 1.1 inches) and heavy rain is forecast all day Friday, which would put the already swollen Shenandoah River past flood stage.
Thursday Thursday
Afternoon: RAIN Night: HEAVY RAIN

Friday:
HEAVY RAIN

Which is why it's a good thing the school has a nice-sized gym to hold the ceremony - since the football field where the celebration normally is held could be under several feet of water (they built the darn thing within the FEMA 100-year flood zone.

*The school just called. The ceremony will be indoors, beginning at 7:30 pm. The doors open at 6:15 pm.

What Is It Doing to Your Body?

2009-05-30T20:23:00.006-04:00

Grease is a sewer system's worse nightmare. Coupled with yeast and you have, what a good friend of mine would call, a clusterfuckation.

Fairfax County, Virginia officials have been dealing with such an event for several years and once they found the culprit, the county filed a lawsuit to force the company responsible to pay for the necessary repairs.

Krispy Kreme says the county doesn’t have any proof the grease is theirs – despite the trail of poly tri-glycerides leading from the company’s plant in Lorton and therefore shouldn’t be responsible for the $1.9 million bill.

County officials meanwhile said the clogged pipes allowed raw sewage to escape onto the surface in several places.

If the grease can clog a sewer main, just think what it can do to your arteries.

Farewell SHS

2009-05-29T05:36:00.004-04:00

Today marks another milestone in the life of Dirtymon and SisIggy as Heir II embarks on his final day as a student at Strasburg High School. Sure he doesn't graduate until next Friday but his last actual class ends at around 3:20 pm today.

Next up will be baccalaurate on Sunday afternoon at Liberty Baptist. He says he's not interested but I bet he'll be there only because Caisee will be there and because, it's the right thing to do. Later Sunday will be the Academic Awards assembly at the school.

Wednesday is the Athletic Banquet where Joe gets to shed some of his geekiness to sit with the Cross Country Team. At least he picked a sport that allowed the geekiness to show a little.

He hasn't said anything but I wouldn't be surprised he has band practice Thursday since the band will be playing the National Anthem and the School Anthem (Shenandoah) at the graduation ceremony.

And then Friday night, after the last recessional, Heir II's status will change from a big fish in a little pond to a little fish in a small pond. He'll have four-plus years ahead of him at Roanoke College to once again be one of the big fishes.

But this morn don't be surprised to see Sis shed a tear or two when the Heir walks out the door. Just like she did five years ago when, as an eighth-grader, Heir II saw him get on Bus 37 for the first time. No wonder she wanted to homeschool him the first eight years of his learning experience.

RIP, Dear Friend

2009-05-28T15:17:00.006-04:00

I learned the passing of a dear friend Wednesday, after what appears to have been a lengthy, slow and agonizing demise. I also learned only a few friends were around for her at the end but now the news has spread near and far, people are flocking to say their fond farewells and wonder, what if anything could have been done to prolong life.

Of course, I'm talking about The Clarke Courier, a 140-year-old weekly newspaper located in Berryville, VA. I had the honor of working part-time for the paper back in the late 80s and early 90s, becoming Sports Editor by default.

Like many businesses in these trying times it was hard trying to find or keep a client base. In newspapers, that base was fellow businesses and their advertising dollars or the lack thereof, that seems to have been the final blow.

The editor at the time, Val VanMeter, let me have free rein of the sports department (how much damage could I do when on a good week I had one whole page sans ads (126 column inches) and if I was really lucky and the only high school had several teams doing well, an extra half-page. I learned to barter with Louie Ebert, our General Manager and head of the ad department as he was the one who ultimately let me have my space.

Val also humored me by allowing me to occasionally write a regular news article (auto wrecks and fires were big ones) and on election nights, she let me help write the actual local election story.

But the biggest appeal to working at The Courier was working side-by-side with my wife, SisIggy, who was the paper's general assignment writer. Sis went with me on many a local high school athletic event where I took the necessary stats needed to produce a 15-inch story, and she - with camera in hand - taking action shots for the lone sports page.

Several years into the gig we even took our oldest son, Heir I with us, strapped in a backpack as we walked the football sidelines.

Val always had a summer picnic at her house for all the reporters and staff. She even invited back those who had gone onto better gigs and at one of these affairs we decided we decided to call ourselves TWITS (I don't know if anyone knew why then and, 20-plus years later, I know they don't know now).

We stopped having them in the mid 90s as our core group left but now the paper has had its swan song maybe its time to bring back the summer outing as there are more twits - the staffers who put in long hours for the past nine months - only to wake up and find themselves out of a job.

At least, we left voluntarily.

Dear Heloise,

2009-05-28T11:24:00.003-04:00

Thought I would drop you a quick line to give your readers a sure-fire hint to clean a stubborn, dirty kitchen floor that's been bombarded by six muddy dogs (after three days of rain), two teenage boys and one Dirtymon.

All you need to do is fill a kitchen sink full of dirty dishes, walk away from it for about five minutes and upon your return, the floor will be covered with approximately two inches of hot, sudsy water.

Then take a mop and bucket, soaking up the excess water. A wet-dry vacuum will also help followed by a roll of paper towels to eradicate the floor of the final vestiges of water.

When all is said and done, you will have a pristine floor clean enough to eat off of (at least until the six dogs, two boys and the Dirtymon returns.

No Pit Bull Adoptions / Winchester - tv3winchester.com

2009-05-27T11:16:00.002-04:00

No Pit Bull Adoptions / Winchester - tv3winchester.com

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The above article once again shows the unfortunate power of PETA (ie., the Norfolk-based animal-rescue group) and unsuspecting judges who are bazzled by that organization's zealots who call themselves lawyers.

PETA is no more a rescue group than it is a KILL-SHELTER.

When It Rains Here in Dirtymon - Land, We Celebrate

2009-05-27T07:58:00.005-04:00

Here in Dirtymon Land we're finding new and low-cost (for us anyway) ways to celebrate the pending graduation of Heir II from high school. Who needs to buy celebratory balloons that will pop and be nothing when you can have self-sealing bubbles that re-appear each time we get an inch of rain.

This first one arrived several weeks ago when we were in the beginning of monsoon season. We caught it just as the weight of the water was too much for elasticity and the remnants flowed down the wall onto the fireplace hearth, thus no photographic memory.

The second appeared yesterday during the height of our latest storm and we saw it in time to grab the camera and get this neat photo -- as if we needed physical evidence to show our landlord. Moments later, it too burst and flowed along the inside bricks of the chimney, down the safety screen before puddling on the hearth.

We informed our landlord the first time and will show him photos this time. He's been busy of late what with providing us with a good kind of water. We know he'll find the source in due time, though he may have to wait for another heavy downpour to pinpoint it.

In the interim, we'll keep the camera ready as the Heir's date with destiny nears. We wouldn't want to prevent H-II from any less acts of celebration.

Every Garden Needs A Layout

2009-05-24T07:44:00.006-04:00

When I was younger I sold American seeds to all my friends and relatives. As I grew older, I looked forward to the catalogs published by Burpee and Southern States, especially to look at their garden layouts and newest gadgets to make the task easier.

When I taught Agriculture a lifetime ago, I had my students prepare a garden layout for one of their class assignments. The purpose - before planting - was to determine whether everything would fit and to keep certain plantings separate to prevent cross-pollination (peppers and tomatoes, for example).

I did a layout for my garden too. The only difference is I did it after the fact. Hope the gardening Gods don't hold it against me.

Yikes! The Creature Known As Dirtium Maxus Has Found Its Way to Virginia

2009-05-23T20:44:00.019-04:00

It was just as Dark Garden described him and apparently, the creature John Boy said he thought he saw several weeks ago in Maryland has migrated south. Standing down in the west 40 this morning I saw this surreal, hairy creature hunched over my garden area that was supposed to be planted today.

He was as rotund as he was tall. He had grayish-brown hair all over his head, back, chest and even the legs had folicles of hair. And just like the sighting from DG, this creature had orange, web-feet.

I wanted to escape; get as far from him as quickly as possible. But something drew me towards him and that's when I saw the creature actually had a nice side to him -- he was planting my garden for me.

I hollered to SisIggy to fetch the camera while I grabbed our camping chairs and a pitcher of mint julips. We set the chairs in the shade and watched the big fellar get to work.

First he raked the clods left over from disking the ground. The he set rows and then began planting. First there were two rows of lettuce. Next came 1 3/4-rows of onions with a small patch of chive. He also gave us peppers, more onions, collards, radish, cukes, squash, and a bunch of tomatoes.

The creature didn't plant any corn but it did leave us room for six rows of SilverQueen. I only hope he comes back tomorrow and finishes the job.

As it finished the last of the plantings, it sat down on a drywall compound bucket and began making grunting noises.

Finally, it tried to stand but remained hunched over as it waddled off towards the neighbor's hay field.

As we watched it continue to walk, it began to straighten up and when it was erect, we saw it was an imposing creature even as it scratched its ass towards the setting sun.

Dad To The Rescue - Again

2009-05-22T06:21:00.001-04:00

All it takes is a phone call and he drops whatever he's doing and gets in the car and drives the 35 or so miles to our place to get us out of another bind.

That's my dad. And, unfortunately, I don't say thank you enough.

When we moved into these new digs a year ago I brought along my self-propelled mower, which was OK for a small yard. But, here at Dirtmanland, we have almost an acre of grass to mow on a weekly basis.

And with two Heirs unwilling to mow -- even when their mother attempted to do it to help me out -- we knew a rider was needed.

We were rescued by my dad, who brought us an antique rider he had in storage. He told us then, that with a little TLC, the Murray would last us through the crisis.

It did last year and for several mowings this spring until the mower blade belt gave way. Fortunately, dad had a spare he had bought years ago when he was told Murray parts and belts would no longer be available.

He came within an hour, installed said belt and we were back in action.

Meanwhile, I scoured the 'Net and found one could still buy Murray parts online. With that info, Dad asked a friend in the business whether he could get parts and presto, today dad arrived with a new pully assembly that won't chew up belts.

We got the south 40 and the east 40 mowed this afternoon after he left with a portable jack to fix for us. I'm sure I told him thank you but if I didn't, I'll do it here -- again -- because I don't know how we would have survived without his - and mom's assistance.

Darwinius Dirtmusilix Foo Boosalix

2009-05-21T11:33:00.002-04:00

Sometimes, it's better just to let fellow bloggers have the last word (for now, at least).

What Do You Call SisIggy When She Gets a Sun Tan?

2009-05-19T01:43:00.003-04:00

Italian Roast, silly.

Seriously, I found this on the Eight O'Clock coffee web site recently. We have drank this variety. Usually we drink the French Roast but I bought a bag for SisIg's Mother's Day present and it arrived a few days late.

We tried it the next morning and found it really good. Too good to be exact. Not your everyday coffee for sure, but one savored for special occasions.

Tolerating Ants

2009-05-18T00:05:00.000-04:00

Several days ago while admiring the peonies growing in our side yard from my desk I thought I saw an ant on one of the buds. Going outside for a closer look, this is what I found:

Oh great, I thought. Now I need to spray the peonies before the ants invade us again on the inside of the house. We had a big infestation earlier this spring and it took a mountain of bug killer to rid us of the creatures.

Fortunately, I asked SisIggy to research this phenomenon and get back to me. She Googled Ants on Peonies and was forwarded to this website which directed her to the Heartland Peony Society site where she found this forum that answered my question.

Thank God for the Internet.

Conquering Appleton, Wisconsin

2009-05-17T17:20:00.004-04:00

Shenandoah University rallied with seven runs in the eighth inning Saturday night to defeat John Hopkins University 11-7 and earn the Hornets their first-ever trip to the NCAA Division III Baseball World Series, scheduled this week in Appleton, Wisconsin.

The eight-team, double-elimination tournament will be played at the Time Warner Cable Field at Fox Cities Stadium, home of the Class A Wisconsin Timber Rattlers.

SU (37-8), was ranked 17^th in the latest D3 poll and is an at-large team in the tournament.

The Hornets, who play in the USA South Conference, defeated seven other teams in the South Regional played this past week at Salisbury, MD Arthur Purdue Stadium.

I want to take this opportunity to congratulate coach Kevin Anderson and his squad of under- achievers. Anderson earned his 300^th-career victory with his team’s win Friday night.

Kevin has been a friend for many years and I wish him and his team success.

I also hope my friend, John from Wisconsin on the Bits and Pieces forum, is a hospitable host for our local team and helps root them towards the D3 title.

I’ll be listening to the games via online radio.

Spring Planting is Done

2009-05-16T06:59:00.001-04:00

It's taken SisIg and me more than a week to plant our front flower beds and to build several new ones but our task is finally over and before we forget, we'd like to give a shameless plug to our local Vocational Agriculture Department / FFA Chapter at Strasburg High School for providing us with all our bedding plants.

Now we can see God's beauty all summer long and provide Heir II with a nice setting for his upcoming high school graduation party.

Ya'll Come (We're Not Goin)

2009-05-15T10:21:00.003-04:00

Starting today and running through Sunday is our town's version of a Spring Celebration.

It's called Strasburg Mayfest and even it has no shame. Each event has a sponsor to provide the festival with a little up-front cash and the business, some cheap advertising.

Sponsored by the local Chamber of Commerce and the Town of Strasburg, the festivities actually began Wednesday night with the opening of the Lion's Club Carnival on the Town Lot. Last night saw a Luncheon and today's activities include a performance of the Grand Ole Opry (don't even want to know how permission was obtained from Nashville for a local musical) and the Stover Funeral Home Street Dance.

The fire department has a pancake breakfast tomorrow morning and after filling up on carbs, one can run in the 5-K race down by the river on the new $87,000 path.

Food concessionaires will be clogging most of downtown making vehicular traffic a nightmare. Sure hope we don't have another of our weekly tractor-trailer wrecks on the Interstate -- I don't know where the extra traffic will be detoured if that happens (well, I do but I don't want to think about it as our road is the only other alternative).

The Arthur, Allamong and Brown, PC Parade kicks off at 4 pm (and will end approximately 15 minutes later). The parade Grand Marshall this year is The Lone Ranger and Silver and the sports grand marshall is olympic gold medalish Mary Wayte Bradburne.

More activities are planned for downtown and at the local town park (Hometown Park) the remainder of the weekend.

I hope all my readers will partake of this exciting time in our neck of the woods. Come visit, spend your money and have a good time. We won't even be close to it, however.

Topper Get Down - Again

2009-05-15T08:45:00.002-04:00

It's been a standing joke around here for some time that our male Beta Dog Topper (Red-Tri Australian Shepherd) likes to jump up on anything living or dead to show how much he loves us.

SisIg coined the phrase and our friends, Trasherati and Jagosaurus, mentions it often.

So I wasn't really surprised this morning when he jumped up on our patio table to drink out of a water bowl I had left there when I mowed yesterday. We had rain last night and the bowl was full just for him.

It's obvious he's a connoisseur of natural water and prefers that over well water. But since he's not paying the bill, he'll have to make due with what's provided (even if it's not as we intended).

I guess he won't be using the commode for his drinking pleasures.

Before and After

2009-05-14T13:15:00.002-04:00

I always believe it's important to take before and after photographs if for no other reason, for posterity.

SisIg and I spent two days this week trimming... er pruning... er stripping the forsythia bush that's straddles the property line between us and our neighbor / landlord. He had told me way back in March it needed to be done and fortunately, his chain saw broke before he could do it.

We researched it and found it's best to trim after blooming and when the yellow flowers began disappearing last week (during the monsoon), said neighbor / landlord said he was itching to get his chainsaw out and do it himself if we didn't do it first.

Personally, I liked the bush as it was but truthfully, it did need a haircut -- but not a buzz cut. It hadn't been properly taken care of for at least five years and maybe even longer.

Here is what it looked like before we made a stab at it.

And here is the finished product:

I must add I couldn't have done it without Sis' help. She handled the pruners while I used my reciprocating saw to cut the larger root stock. I also bundled the multitude of branches and hauled them away to neighbors' / landlords' brush pile.

We were sore Wednesday after finishing the task and even more sore this morning when we tried to get out of bed...

Just Because it looks like a BM doesn't mean it tastes like one

2009-05-12T05:38:00.006-04:00

Editor's Note: Having gone to bed Monday night without posting the blog seen below, I couldn't sleep because I knew Dark Garden wanted to see what I had to say.

Got up at 4 am to write this. Now I'm going back to bed.

Additional Editor's Note: Sisiggy had a great suggestion regarding this post in a comment below. I've decided - it the interest of the viewing public - to add it here a top my blurb: "If you are eating something, either come back later or stop immediately."

I’m sure everyone has gotten an email at one time or another that you thought said one thing but the sender thought otherwise.

It happened to me last Friday evening when an email popped into my inbox from Dark Garden announcing a belated Cinco de Mayo celebration at his abode on Sunday.

Here is an exact copy of the message:

B Y O D
Si. You read it right! B Y O D
Bring Your Own Dip
Here’s the theme sports fans!
Everyone bring your own dip of choice.
Now relax (ART!), you can be silly with it or serious… HOWEVER, it must be palatable!
(Otherwise everyone will be bringing things like “Billy Zane’s Corn Bowel Movement Fiesta Dip.”)
Hmm… well actually… I guess you really could bring a dip called “Billy Zane’s Corn Bowel Movement Fiesta Dip,” but
you can’t go putting real bowel movement in it. Well … .actually… I guess you could, however, everyone will have to have a nice heapin’-honkin’ scoop of their own product before anyone else will be subject to the taste off.
Anyway, you can go ahead and just purchase a ready-to-go jar of Tostitos or Lays or whatever.
Oh… the dip…. It can only accommodate a Tostito type chip. No bread dips or cracker dips.
Remember, we’re celebrating Cinco De Mayo here!
We’ll see you SUNDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Recap:
1. Bring your own chip dip.
2. Must go on a Tostito type chip, come call them a Tortilla, I call them a Tostito type.
3. No poo.
PEACE!!!!!!!

Maybe it’s my ADD or just that I like all things sewage. Whatever the reason, my eyes (Ok, my eye) latched onto this particular statement:

(Otherwise everyone will be bringing things like “Billy Zane’s Corn Bowel Movement Fiesta Dip.”)

And, I missed recap #3.

Yes, I thought our dips would be judged on the one that most resembled a bowel movement.

At Martins on Saturday I found a jar of Newman’s Own Black Bean and Corn Salsa. In the jar it looked like my loose bowels -- a day after eating spicy foods and whole corn.

You know what I’m talking about.

Coupled with a can of re-fried beans and PRESTO – Instant Shit.

At least that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Oh, BTW. We did have a competition and six brave souls produced their own version of BMs. The winner - in a squeaker - was Dark's fresh salsa with John Boy's Death Potion right up there.

I finished near the bottom but that's where Paul Newman's SH*T belongs. If I could have found some from Billy Zane, who knows, maybe I would have won the competition!

Where Have I Been?

2009-05-10T08:16:00.002-04:00

I've received emails and comments from some of my readership wanting to know why I dropped off the face of the earth and haven't blogged since Wednesday a week ago.

There have actually been several reasons.

The Apple Blossom Festival continued in Winchester unabated but I couldn't get anyone in the family to go with me and the festival isn't fun unless you know someone. The local newspapers have started copyrighting their photos so I couldn't borrow any...

Our landlord finally got a backhoe operator here to dig the trench for the new water line. He came mid-morning last Friday and dug the ditch but feigned an important social function he couldn't miss and darted out of here at exactly 5 pm.

He couldn't make it Saturday (something about Apple Blossoms) and then the window of finishing the job quickly abated.

We got 2 1/2-inches of rain Saturday night and another three inches by Monday morning. Over the next three days we got an additional three inches and the ditch was now a moat. It didn't help the operator (his god-given name is Pee-Wee) cut the sump pump line and that water was flowing into the ditch too.

The landlord got the repair kit and I climbed down in the cold abyss and fixed the pipe and perhaps a flooded basement or two.

Friday afternoon, Pee-Wee returned with a pump in hand and finally got the ditch closed in.

Yesterday, the landlord got the water line connected and we are now on his 80-gpm well. No more cisterns. Yea. Oh, did I mention we had to fill the cistern Friday morning or we would have run out by that evening. Ouch. $60 to the water-hauling man.

Cha-ching.

But the really big reason I haven't blogged is that I have been trying to change what I do every day so I don't continue my rut of sitting at the 'puter and dipping SKOAL.

I had been contemplating this a long time. Sis Iggy has been quietly complaining (for an ex smoker, she's been rather nice about it). The Heirs, especially II, has been down right pissy. I made a deal with II in March that I would quit the 30-plus year habit by May 1. I had weaned the habit from a tin every day or two to one every three to four days. I purchased my last cans of the nasty tobacco on Monday, April 27 at approximately 9:45 am.

Whereupon Heir I stole said cans saying I should quit earlier. Said conversation said while he was smoking, btw.

Got cans back. Started Dipping. Finished last can about 10 pm April 30. Rinsed mouth out around midnight and haven't touched any form of tobacco now for 10 days. I know I was a bitch for the first three or four day and for that, I apologize. I hope, since then, I have mellowed.

When I first started the habit back in college, a can cost $0.17. The last cans were $3 each since I bought 2. I have paid as much as $4.57 for a can and that was before the 04/01/09 fed tax increase.

So not only will I maybe gain a few more years of living, I will save a few bucks too. And since the latter is still slim in this stinking economy...

West Virginia Does It Again

2009-04-29T12:23:00.001-04:00

Bobby Byrd may have voluntarily vacated his position as Chairman of the US Senate Appropriations Committee but the octogenarian ain’t dead yet.

The senior West Virginia bureaucrat somehow managed to insert 9.5 percent of additional pork in the Agriculture Department’s $615.8 million American Recovery and Reinvestment Act that President Obama signed in late February.

Agriculture Secretary Tom Vilsack announced the breakdown of funding yesterday, saying: "Aging water and waste infrastructure systems threaten the ability of rural communities to provide clean, reliable drinking water to residents and protect precious environmental resources. These investments will help bring increased economic benefits to rural America by providing needed water, water systems and creating jobs."

Maybe. Maybe not.

Two projects were highlighted:

The Yuma County Improvement District in Arizona was selected to receive $14.6 million to connect 782 homes to the Yuma municipal treatment system. The project will reduce groundwater contamination from failing septic systems and improve the water quality of the Colorado River. This translates to a cost of $18,670 per home, which in my opinion, is less expensive than upgrading existing individual septic systems.

In New Mexico, the Village of Ruidoso and City of Ruidoso Downs have been selected to receive $9.7 million to build a wastewater treatment plant that will serve approximately 12,000 people. The current treatment plant's outflow runs into the environmentally sensitive Rio Ruidoso and is not in compliance with water quality regulations. The new plant will treat combined flows from both communities before they are discharged into the stream.

On the surface it looks like the New Mexico project is a good idea. But check out the web site for Ruidoso and one will find the village is toted as the New Mexico Vacation destination”.

Included is a ski resort, a national forest, two casinos, horse racing, golf courses and a host of fine dining, shopping areas and art museums.

Will the stimulus money help the private citizen’s individual septic problems or will it help a select few corporations make even more money?

But back to Bobby Byrd.

West Virginia leads the nation with 23 separate projects in 22 jurisdictions totaling $58,417,800. Michigan is second in number of projects (18) but got more money ($63,442,000) and, surprisingly, Maine with 18 projects is third on the list but just three percent of the money ($17,925,000).

Thirty-four states got money. New Jersey had only one project for less than a million dollars and the other 16 states must already have pristine waters.

The primary purpose of the stimulus bill is to create or save jobs while helping to protect the environment.

I truly hope it succeeds in that goal. But I doubt it. I suspect, at least in West Virginia’s case, there will be a lot more sewage treatment plants named for the 91 year-old senator.

The Hummers Have Found Where We Live

2009-04-29T08:12:00.003-04:00

Sat down at SisIggy's computer early this morning to check out email sent to our regular account and happened to glance out the window just in time to see this:

Had I been at my computer, which is opposite Sis's at our Partner's Desk, I wouldn't have had access to the camera and thus this shot. Didn't have time to switch from Auto focus to Sports focus which, now that I know we have it (only have had the camera for three years), I might have gotten a shot of the wings.

Illusion?

2009-04-28T08:11:00.001-04:00

Which is it? Is the ball resting on the concrete patio or is it flying through the air. You decide. You tell me.

The Bloom's Program Now on Sale

2009-04-28T08:04:00.002-04:00

Get yer program, get yer program. Five Dolla's.

The hawkers are out in force this morning at the major intersections of Winchester as well as local convenience stores. They're selling the official program detailing the parade lineups for both the Fireman's Parade and the Grand Feature Parade as well as providing the colorful anecdotes about the aging stars that make up the celebration.

Anyone wanting one from out of town, just email me or leave me a message on one of the boards and I will ship it to you. Because, I know you'll be disappointed not having a piece of history.

Happy Birthday, Heir II

2009-04-27T21:48:00.004-04:00

Our youngest, Heir II, celebrated his 18th birthday today and in true Linguinni - Dirtman tradition, the festivities actually began yesterday when his grandparents dropped off a nice cash card while having dinner here.

There was a 100-plus page book to finish last night and this morning, along with some Statistics homework and with his normal three hours of sleep, he left for school early.

Tonight, the Heir was still wired. He played soccer with The Pode for over 30 minutes after dinner and then, when girlfriend Caisee arrived from play practice we had cake and more gifts.

Jose, you have made us proud.

The Bloom - Part 2

2009-04-27T20:03:00.016-04:00

With the first weekend festivities around us (a wine and craft festival on the downtown Mall - which I didn't partake), the main week is upon us.

Traveling through Winchester this afternoon I made a pit stop behind the near-vacant Wards Plaza to watch the Food Lion Apple Blossom Midway come to life.

Only a few of the rides provided by Powers Great American Midways, were already up and tractor-trailers were still arriving. I was able to get this photo (right) of the slide with the Vortex in the background as well as this shot of the Scrambler (they call it the Sizzler) still in its compact moving trailer.

I even saw this kiddie ride (right) consisting of four bears. What they do is beyond me but it reminded me of John from Wisconsin, Michael C., Mark A. and Rebel for some reason.

Carnivals have always fascinated me. I remember as a boy watching the local amusement company arrive Sunday afternoon for the Firemen's Carnival. It would take the rest of the day Sunday and all day Monday to set up the rides and even then, some didn't open until Tuesday night.

Now the trucks arrive, a few buttons are pushed, jacks are set and a couple hydraulics are placed in position and a ride can be assembled in a matter of minutes. Rest assured, Powers will be set up in plenty of time to be inspected by the state and open for business tomorrow night. It will stay open during the entire festival and if it's like past years, the midway will be filled to capacity.

I have many memories of carnivals and most are pleasant.

I remember a Scrambler speeding up one night at our hometown county fair making everyone aboard sicker than a dog. It was the last year for that carnival at the fair. The next year a new company was hired and they stayed with us for over 25 years. The owner's sons and I became friends and their children played with mine when the came in recent years.

I remember when my wife bought me my first K'Nex set (at the age of 35) and I was able - with the help of the Heirs - to build a working Ferris Wheel.

If I had it to do over again, I would run away with the carnival. Or own one. Either way, if I see one being set up, I will stop and think about times gone by.

Just A Quickie Before Heading to Work

2009-04-27T08:19:00.003-04:00

Turned on the Internet this morning to my Google Home Page and thought something was wrong. Seemed the GOOGLE name was nothing but straight lines and periods. Second time I saw it, was more concerned and finally, it hit me.

Today is Samuel Morse's 218th birthday. So everyone join me in singing a Happy Birthday to ole Sam.

Found on a Bumper Yesterday

2009-04-26T11:17:00.003-04:00

Actually, SisIggy saw it first but I had to take the photo because she was afraid the bumper's owner would exit our local library while she was taking the shot and someone would be embarrassed.

This is for the two John's I know: Wisconsin and West Virginia. I believe both would appreciate it. As for everyone else, please don't be offended.

Gardening 101

2009-04-26T11:08:00.004-04:00

Several days ago while I was searching for information for Heir II's band trip (he got home this morning at 2:15 am) on his school's web page, I saw the FFA Chapter was having a bedding plant sale.

SisIggy and I went Thursday, bought tomato, pepper, zucchini and cucumber plants for our garden as well as petunias, geraniums and a cover flower for the front gardens. Later, Thursday evening I prepared one of the front gardens (I have the other to do later today) and this morning I planted while Sis directed.

I have to say the front looks a lot better if I could just get the Heirs to pick the dandelion flowers on a daily basis...

It's Apple Blossom Time in the Valley!!!

2009-04-25T08:31:00.007-04:00

The Bloom began yesterday for its 10-day run.

And over the next fortnight or so, I will be reporting here on the coming and goings of the annual festival for those less fortunate not able to attend. Hopefully, I will get some photos myself if I can talk the rest of the family to going.

I know my mother yearns for the Circus this year thanks to tickets she "won" for re-upping her subscription the the Northern Virginia Daily. I think I'll pass on that one, however...

Today's snippet comes from yesterday's trial run of the coronation ceremony in anticipation for Friday's crowning of another Michael Landon (left) prodigy (previously, Landon's daughters: 1980's Leslie Ann Landon and 1996's Shawna Landon). Holly Morris (right), a DC newscaster subbed for the Landon kid and apparently enjoyed her 10-minute reign.

My sincere hope is the weather is dry, not too hot and loads of people trek out from inside the Beltway and bring some of their government salaries with them to spread some cash to our local non-profits, many which is their main source of funding for the year.

Tastes Just Like...

2009-04-24T00:01:00.000-04:00

SisIggy purchased Smuckers Sugar-Free Strawberry Jam to use as a substitute for the real thing. A jar of the special stuff is twice as small as the regular jam, costs twice as much and, according to Sis, "tastes just like cough syrup".

So when you go to your local grocery make sure to pick up this when you feel a cold coming on.

Body Art Gone Bad

2009-04-23T10:51:00.002-04:00

Give him an inch, he'll take a mile.

No, I'm not talking about Heir I. This time, it's Heir II. He called last night asking if he could go to a friend's house and promised he be home by curfew. He called back at 11:30 requesting an extension and I granted it; then stayed up to make sure he arrived home safely.

He did -- around 12:30 am this morning. I wasn't so worried about the time since he was planning an all-nighter in anticipation to a 5:30 am departure for a band trip. We know he made it as we heard him leave the house in darkness...

When he arrived home, this is what we had found:

Fortunately, they're temporary tattoos. They'll eventually rub off or at least that's what I've been told. I wouldn't know for sure because I'd never get a fake or real one because I hate self-inflicted pain and can't see spending money on them.

A friend once told me she had three and probably will get more in the future. She said she loves flowers and art and her tats are a reflection of her tastes.

I don't think Heir I has any taste, at least in the matters of body art. Fortunately for him, he opted for the fake ones his first time out. Had they been real, his momma -- SisIggy to those in the know -- would have killed the lad making his all-niter moot.

Earth Day, 2009

2009-04-22T17:13:00.011-04:00

If you didn't already know it, today is Earth Day. As an environmental steward (not to be confused with one of those hatred [or hated] environmentalists), I look forward to this day every year.

And my small part this year was to spruce up our yard.

I cultivated and planted a herb garden for SisIggy. If it turns out, we'll have fresh parsley, basil, oregano and mint.

I also prepared the gnome garden for some type of annual we'll plant this weekend and a pot for Sis to plant a Rosemary tree.

Last but not least, I moved our Adirondack chairs from the patio to a nice grassy spot overlooking the bird bath and
rigged up a hummingbird station
that's nestled among the peonies.

It even looks like we'll have sunflowers growing around our feeding station since volunteers are growing taller every day.

All in all, Earth Day 2009 wasn't a bad day afterall.

Yum Yum

2009-04-21T17:05:00.002-04:00

Tuesdays in Dirtman-land is French Toast day.

SisIggy prepares a delectable breakfast consisting of fantastic slices of French Toast smothered in maple syrup.

Today, however, was even more remarkable as she had made a Banana Nut loaf the day before and at my suggestion, sliced and toasted it before dipping it into the egg batter.

What can I say. It was yummy.

The only downside is she will have to bake another loaf of special bread next Monday so next Tuesday's French Toast Day can top today's treat.

My suggestion: In honor of the 82nd Annual Apple Blossom Festival, a nice Applesauce Cake might be nice.

How Many Eckersons Does It Take To Plan a Roadtrip?

2009-04-20T15:35:00.002-04:00

John Adams once said "I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is called a disgrace; that two are called a law firm, and that three or more become a Congress! So how many Eckersons would it take to screw up a simple Saturday roadtrip to tour a Civil War battlefield.

It started simple enough. John Boy and I thought it would be good to tour the Battle of Monocacy Junction, an 1864 battle that ended the South's last forray in Yankee territory.

Only problem, we couldn't find any information about it on the Internet and didn't even know where in central Maryland it was located. We decided to be polite and invite John Boy's siblings along for the ride, knowing from past experience they wouldn't "waste" a Saturday touring one of John Boy's battlefield excursions.

Guess what. We were wrong. SisIggy and Dark Garden both said "what a wonderful idea".

We met in the railroad town of Brunswick because we knew there was a National Park Service Visitor Center for the C&O Canal. Surely someone (a park ranger, for example) there would know something about Monacracy Creek (especially, as it turns out, the battlefield is located in the same county).

Not a clue. The man could talk all day about the C&O and even about Civil War skirmishes protecting said canal. But he was clueless and suggested we tour Antietam instead. Guess that battle was big enough to at least know the name.

But before we could start the Exodus , we had to wait on John Boy, who's fascination with the Civil War Trail network is reknown the world over. Here, he reads about Brunswick's role in the war.

So we loaded up in the cars and tried to figure out how to get from Point A to Point B. Should have been pretty simple.

But then the Eckerson clan doesn't know the word simple. Before we could head out, there had to be a pow-wow to mesh out the details.

We knew if we followed these signs we'd be on the right track. Only problem, Maryland is stingy with these signs. I think we missed one in Boonesboro - or there wasn't one - but about an hour later we got a call from Dark asking where everything was. Seems he was cruisin Hagerstown and we were in Funkstown, about 15 miles out of the way.

Credit John Boy.

He took the map from me. And so he should since he's a professional cartographer. Hell, he dreams maps in his sleep.

Finally we made it to Sharpsburg (I am a southerner) and then there were more decisions to make:

1) Should we take the guided tour from a ranger?
2) Should we buy the CD, pile into one of the cars and hit the military park on our own?
3) Should we buy the brochure (ain't nothing free anymore from the government)? OR
4) Should we all stand around a cannon and discuss it for another hour?

OK. Perhaps it was only 30 minutes but the point is, let's make a decision how 'bout it.

Finally, it was decided that we buy a brochure for Monocacy River and use a brochure someone else purchased; then dropped in a trashcan after realizing the CD was the route to take.

I won't bore anyone with the actual tour. Dark Garden did a nice take on his blog and SisIggy did one too (though I'm not sure I cared for the poke at my size and my looking like a "honkin' big war memorial blocking your view". She followed that comment with a Photoshop-distorted picture of yours truly. Decide for yourself and I'd be interested in your comments.

Now all we need to do is decide when we're going to Monocracy Creek. And how many Eckersons will it take to get us there.

24 Hours Later: My Fix For a Year

2009-04-05T14:01:00.002-04:00

Just finished watching two epic movies: The Blue and The Gray (1982) and North and South (1985, 1986 and 1994).

About once a year I get in the mood to watch these two made-for-TV mini-series. I thoroughly enjoy the Geysers and the Hales and as SisIggy says, "Stacy Keach single-handily winning the war".

The same with the Main and Hazard families though by the third book in the series, it gets a little contrite. Or maybe I have tired of the saga.

Thank You Heir I

2009-03-12T14:51:00.003-04:00

It took me about two hours on and off today to bury a 100-foot long, 7/8-inch diameter garden hose for our soon-to-be backup water supply from our neighbor landlord.

In that span I had managed to bury about 20 feet.

Heir I came out to help once he arose from bed, had a shower and breakfast.

And am I glad he did.

In less than a half hour we had completed the task with him doing the grunt work with the shovel and me, burying the hose and tamping the earth with my big fat knee.

He did almost nick my pinkie once or twice but fortunately I was able to pull it in time. And it's a good thing too.

"Whew, you almost got me," I said.

"Don't worry, I wouldn't get you," he said. "I don't want to have to take you to the ER. I want to go to my girlfriend's this afternoon."

Well I feel better now, thank you very much.

Editor's note: There is no photo for this blog as Heir I doesn't like his mug on the internet and with a buried hose, all one would see would be the open expanse of the back 40 and you've seen enough of that already.

Heir (II) Testing

2009-03-12T09:36:00.002-04:00

SisIggy, Heir II and I will get up really early tomorrow morning and head off to Salem so the Heir can take a battery of tests and interviews for several scholarships offered by Roanoke College.

We hope he does well.

A Sump and A Pump: Water Issues - Again

2009-03-11T22:15:00.000-04:00

"Dad, something is wrong with the sump pump," Heir I told me as he tried to shake me from a deep sleep. That was early Tuesday morning (around 3:30 am to be exact) and after finally waking up I muttered, "unplug it and if water doesn't back up into the basement, I'll fix it in the morning."

I did investigate Tuesday and found the reason the float wouldn't drop, fixed it and thought our worries were over.

This morning, around 5 a.m., Heir I again woke me from my warm bed: "Dad, water is spraying all over the basement," he said. "You got to get up and fix it."

I got up, went into the dungeon he calls home, looked at the pump that brings water from the cistern and indeed saw a fine spray emitting from a plug. I fixed it then by turning off the breaker in the electrical panel and went back to bed.

Later, I investigated and found the pump had run the cistern dry and popped a rubber hose off the pump. After re-attaching it and ordering in another 1,500 gallons of potable water, the problem was solved for now.

Our landlord, however, wants to install a backup plan and tomorrow, Heir I and I will dig a 100-foot trench to place garden hose from our outside water bibb to our landlord's water line. This will work until he can get permanent structure in place later this spring.

And maybe, I'll be able to get a full night's sleep.

Post

2009-03-10T21:02:00.000-04:00

It may not look like much of anything -- a couple whitewashed boards lying on pavement but to us, history fell apart today when a passing motorist careened into The White Post.

The landmark is listed on the National Register of Historic Places and the original post was placed here by George Washington in 1750. The post provided early visitors directions to four distinct points of reference: Berry's Ferry, Battletown, New Town and Greenway Court, the home of Thomas, Sixth Lord of Fairfax, the original owner of what is now all of the Northern Shenandoah Valley, northern West Virginia and parts of Ohio.

Washington, by the way, surveyed this area for Fairfax in the mid-18th century before going on to other things.

The locust post underneath the structure was not damaged and a new facade will be in place by the weekend.

What A Weekend!

2009-03-09T08:58:00.006-04:00

Temps hit in the high 70s both Saturday and Sunday which meant I had to dig out my shorts from winter storage.

I know, the weather won't last but I just had to do it, if for no other reason than to pick on John (not no name) from Wisconsin, who was enjoying another snowy weekend.

We decided another BBQ was in order and we took out frozen Cornish Game Hens we got on a super deal last month. After thawing, I fired up the rotisserie on the grill, skewered the hens and sat back and watched the birds slowly turn on the spit.

Ninety minutes later the hens were done and we were ready to eat.

Taking a cue from Kevin Weeks, we knew plating was as important as the quality of the food. Fortunately, Heir II's stash from his restaurant gig Sunday included a green bean and carrot medley that meshed nicely with the Jadite plates and coloring of the birds.

Sis made homemade dinner rolls that added to the color and the meal was a success.

The Recipe:

1 1/2 cups White Vinegar
1/2 cup EVOO
1/8 cup Tabasco Sauce
1/4 cup Sea Salt
1/16 cup Freshly-Ground Black Pepper
1/4 cup Basil, fresh chopped
1/8 cup Garlic Salt fresh garlic would be better, diced)
1/8 cup Sage
1/8 cup Thyme

Stir all ingredients until salt has dispersed throughout the solution. Stir while basting. Basting should be done after meat reaches 130 degrees internal temperature, about 10 minutes before removing from rotisserie.

Rest meat 10 minutes before serving.

Bon Appetite!

No Name Cafe Was A Hit

2009-03-08T20:56:00.000-04:00

SisIg and I really enjoyed the buffet at the No Name Saturday night. As always, the ambiance was superb and the BBQ Pork exquisite.

Thanks for inviting us!

No Name Cafe Here We Come

2009-03-07T08:42:00.001-05:00

We're heading to the No Name Cafe later today for dinner but will be back in time to watch all the electronic clocks in the house lose an hour. Catch everyone tomorrow.

Another Sign of Spring

2009-03-06T16:13:00.003-05:00

Blink an eye (yea, I know when you only have one, it's even more of a joke) and you miss signs of spring.

Yesterday I witnessed crocuses popping through the soil here at Dirtmanland. Today, I saw they were an inch taller despite Hokie and Abby stepping all over them.

SisIggy saw we now had tulips sprouting in the front flower bed and I saw one of our forsythia starting to green.

I can't wait until I have to get the battery back in the riding mower and mow the back 40.

BBQ on a Spring Day

2009-03-06T08:39:00.004-05:00

Yesterday was such a lovely day it was meant to be outdoors. I picked up the back yard of all that had been blown in by the recent windstorms and even got most of the dog droppings (when you have six dogs in a confined area and haven't done the task for a month this can be time-consuming). We want to get it all before we heat up and produce a gas factory.

By lunchtime I commented it would be nice to grill dinner and SisIggy thought that an excellent idea. We settled on BBQ Chicken and I went to the freezer to get four leg quarters so they could thaw.

Then I prepared my sauce:

2 cups catsup
1 cup Dijon mustard
1/4 cup Rasperry Walnut vinaigrette
1/2 cup lemon juice
1/4 cup orange juice
1/8 cup lime juice
1/8 cup Tabasco Sauce
3 T brown sugar
1 t sea salt
1/2 t black pepper
1/2 t oregano
1/2 t tyme
2 garlic cloves
1/2 t garlic salt
1 medium onion, diced

I mixed all the ingredients, brought it to a boil and then simmered it for an hour.

Then I began grilling the chicken while SisIggy prepared corn and a salad and set the table.
Heir II had a girls soccer game he wanted to go see so we (yes all four of us) sat down to dinner at 5:15 pm.

By 6 pm, the dishes were done and we were able to enjoy a nice, quiet evening.

The Crocuses are Coming; The Crocuses are Coming

2009-03-05T18:33:00.002-05:00

A sure-fire sign of Spring:

I found this patch of crocuses popping through the ground at the corner of the house today. If I can keep the Aussies off them, I think they will be in full bloom by Saturday. It got into the 70s today and may reach that again tomorrow, Saturday and Sunday.

Eat your hearts out my friends to the north.

Will the Piping Plovers and Sea Turtles Win?

2009-03-05T08:25:00.004-05:00

Let's hope the Cape Hatteras National Seashore Park Superintendent can prepare a plan to protect the Piping Plover and Sea Turtles that can satisfy US District Court Judge Terrence Boyle. Apparently, a committee charged with developing a plan could not.

At stake here, from the environmentalist's point of view, would be close NC Route 12 to all vehicular and pedestrian traffic and let nature take its course. That option isn't viable as we all know the Outer Banks depends on tourists for much of its fragile economy.

We've been to the seashore sanctuary several times over the past few years and have encountered areas that were off limits to humans. These sites were confirmed Piping Plover nests and brooding areas and I can't say it was an inconvenience to me to let them have their own space.

There has to be a happy medium for the engangered species and humans to exist.

Defining Skiffs

2009-03-04T09:15:00.005-05:00

There's been much discussion over on Bits and Pieces about what a skiff is.

I've used that term to describe the magnificent snows we've gotten here in Dirtmanland this winter.

Monday's storm was no exception. It started snowing around 9 pm Sunday evening and continued through the night. Our first inkling on the magnitude of the snowfall was at 5:20 am when we got the automatic alert phone call from the local school system announcing school was closed for the day.

We awoke two hours later thinking we'd be spending the day shoveling snow so we could meet with civilization. Instead, this is what we saw: Another skiff - less than an inch of snow on the ground.

At least our birds enjoyed winter's respite and our hi-grade seeds.

The wind, however, was blowing 30 mph and, with the occasional leftover flurry, we did have drifting snow across the state road in front of our house:

Two more hours and the sun was out and most of our snow was barren on the ground. Here, our beloved Aussies are enjoying their time outdoors while we contemplated rest inside.

And, so John of Wisconsin (not to be confused with J*** of Nowhere), this is how we live here in Dirtmanland. We'd welcome the opportunity to trade places with you for a season just so as long as the pups can come with us.

Yesterday Is One To Remember -- NOT.

2009-03-03T08:30:00.004-05:00

We had snow. Not a lot. Not even a little. But enough to cancel school, which left Heir II home for a day to spend quality time with the family. II slept in, getting up around 11:30 more than six hours after his mother and me.

Heir I got up around the same time, early (hell, a lot earlier) by his standard, which meant chaos for the bathroom.

I had gotten a little work done in the morning hours and the dogs were all taken care of. SisIggy had washed the kitchen floor just as II came out from his bedroom and I, from the cellar he calls home.

Don't you dare come into the kitchen, Sis said just as the basement door opened and Heir I appeared.

What do you mean I can not come upstairs? Heir I asked.

It went downhill from there as the testosterone consumed the house. The Heirs got into it at that point and even I got into the act. Heir I stole my peanut butter and jelly sandwich at one point throwing the bread into the air and onto the carpet where Hokie sniffed and turned away like a trained dog is supposed to do.

The Heirs made up later in the day, just in time for Caisee to arrive for a delicious dinner, including desert, that Sis prepared. I even got back at Heir I, stealing his homemade lemonade as we sat down to dinner.

Then, as we prepared for sleep, we found one of our old and beloved cats was finally succumbing to her cancer. She has lost control of her bladder and Sis ended up on the couch and me, in my chair for the night.

Fluffy and I will visit the vet later today and I unfortunately already, know the results. But she will be better off and we will too for the love and devotion she has given us for the past decade and more.

Yes, school's back in session today and Heir I is still in the dungeon as I type this. The testosterone has lowered to bearable levels as we trudge through another day.

NOTE: Heir II went with me to the vet and he confirmed what we already knew. Fluffy had cancer and it had spread throughout her body. We stayed as he put her to sleep, then left to go to my parents to help on a project.

Dr. Seuss on a Blustery Birthday

2009-03-02T10:02:00.005-05:00

Who Knew?

A Skiff of Snow

Could Blow

A Blistery, Blustery Puff of Glow

OK, I admit that is a lame excuse honoring Dr. Seuss on his 105th birthday but it's the best I can do as we wind down from our biggest snowstorm of the season.

We awoke this morning to another skiff, barely covering the grass in the front yard. But the wind was blowing as promised and there actually was snow drifting across the road. Of course, with only a skiff the drift wasn't much.

Oh, to live just a few miles east of here. They got upwards to several inches on the other side of the mountain and even more across I-95.

Do we have to elect Marion Barry again as mayor of Washington to get another 36-inch blizzard. I hope it doesn't take that.

Opossum, anyone?

2009-02-27T12:11:00.004-05:00

At a message board I frequently post on, we recently had a discussion about all the ways to cook nurtia, a beaver-like rat specimen that destroys wetlands and bogs. That led to my pigsfeet blog earlier this week.

Now, I'm here to report on the opossum, the nocturnal creature that I haven't even found a use for.

It seems this man, Clay Logan, hosts several thousand people every New Year's Eve for the annual Possum Drop.

It's North Carolina's equivalent of the New York City Times Square extravaganza and Logan actually lowers a caged opossum as the clock winds down to midnight. Notice I wrote lowered instead of dropped like the do in other cities. Dropping an opossum would be inhumane to some folks while lowering is an allowable form of entertainment.

So if you have nothing else to do next December 31, join me as we head down to Clay's Corner, which I understand to be a small hamlet (population has remained at 200 for the past 100 years) near Brasstown, in Clay County, NC.

After all, it's the Opossum Capital of the World.

Editor's Note: Special thanks to the author of a new blog I came across yesterday, Dogs, Puppies and Prose, who visited Brasstown this past December 31 and witnessed the event. Also thanks to Boodro, the poster on Bits and Pieces that has lowered us to this new level of enterprise.

What's For Supper?

2009-02-26T07:55:00.003-05:00

Hey Grandpa, What's For Supper? was one of the joke lines for the Hee-Haw TV show back in the 70s. If you missed it then, you can watch reruns now on cable's RFDTV. In the joke, Grandpa Jones would rattle off a litany of foodstuffs that were considered southern delicacies to some and gawd-awful to others.

I don't know if it's a Mardi Gras thing or just the beginning of a change in eating habits but a recent perusal of our local newspaper's church dinner ads got me thinking about it. And, a recent dialog on the Pulitzer-Prized Bit's & Pieces Blog between Boodro, Nancy, Michael C., Mark A., John and myself last night must have made me hungry enough to find something to compliment Boo's Fried Nutria.

So I am inviting my family and friends at B & P to join me Saturday for a Chicken and Pigs Feet marathon. Be sure to RSVP so I know how many feet to order.

Heir II Wins A Group 2

2009-02-18T23:55:00.000-05:00

It took Heir II about 15 minutes today to accomplish what he couldn't in four years: win an All-Bull Run District medal.

How he did it makes it all the more fun. He was entered as a last-minute substitute for Strasburg High School's Co-Ed Varsity Forensic Team when two classmates couldn't participate in the district competition held at Madison County High School.

Heir II has always had nothing but disdain for any academic achievement. Just because he will graduate in June as the top male student in his class and among the top six or seven overall. He excels in math, takes AP classes and has maintained straight A's throughout most of his high school career but try and get him to go out for the Academic Team or be a member of the One-Act Play or, the Forensic team and the Heir would run the other way.

That was our surprise when he called at 1:30 pm this afternoon seeking permission to "go to Madison for a forensic outing."

I thought he meant he was going to James Madison University with his girlfriend Caisee and her Advanced Biology classmates to view a cadaver. We were the surprised ones when he got home tonight and proudly displayed his silver medal.

"I got second place for Impromptu Speaking," Heir said. "How wild is that?"

"What did you have to do?" SisIggy asked.

"What I do best," he said. "Talk for 15 minutes about Michael Phelps and Trimming a Christmas Tree. You know, just bullsh** them."

Yes we know. He's been doing that to us for the past 17 years. And to think you can earn All-District honors for it.

Now he gets to go to the state's Region B Co-Ed Forensic Championship, March 15 at Buffalo Gap.

And that's no BULLSH**.

Flu anyone

2009-02-17T08:38:00.002-05:00

We've had a rash of flu-like symptoms here in Dirtland for the past week. It's debatable who the instigator is in all of this but Heir I claims he got his from his girlfriend. Of course, he had taken a two-day trip to visit friends and play non-stop video games just prior to coming home and polluting the basement.

Heir I is still in school so I am banking that he picked up the bug there. He missed several days of school but managed to play a basketball game with a bunch of asses one night and had a candlelight picnic on Valentine's Day with his girlfriend...

Heir II is back in school now, just in time for the talent show.

And we can't forget SisIggy. She had it bad the past three days but is showing signs of recovery. At least we can hope and pray.

Making My Bride Happy

2009-02-14T23:55:00.001-05:00

I could have given SisIggy the ride she always has wanted.

This balloon floated over our house yesterday and I was able to snap a couple of shots...

But I had a better and less expensive idea for her for Valentine's Day. Not that I'm cheap but we all need to be more frugal in these tough economic times. I went to the local grocery store, purchased fresh ingredients (most items were on sale) and prepared a romantic dinner for two.

(The Heirs both had dates also. Heir I prepared his date a Ramon Noodle casserole and Heir II had a candlelit picnic for his girlfriend).

What I finally came up with:

Spring Garden Mix sprinkled with Feta Cheese with Ranch Dressing on the side
Beef Sirloin grilled rare over an open flame
Baked Idaho Potato garnished with Butter and Sour Cream
Strawberry Parfait topped with Whipped Cream

It might not make the cover of Bon Appetite or even Kevin Weeks' blog but I thought the dinner was a nice touch for my bride tonight in honor of our 22nd year together. We've been married for 21 years but I proposed to SisIggy back on Valentine's Day, 1987.

Those that have known us all that time already know the story on how the proposal was made. For those who don't, here it is: I took an ad out in the local newspaper where she worked taking obituaries from local funeral homes.

I was one of those who called obits into the papers and one day in 1986, I had the honor of calling in five obits to her. By the fifth one, she swore I was making them up just so I could talk to her. We continued our phone calls for a few weeks and then I asked her out.

Our first date was Oct. 10 of that year and I proposed the following February.

The ad, by the way, generated an article in the same newspaper that was picked up by the AP and sent to newspapers and other media outlets around the world. We had our 15 minutes of fame and then some and then we settled into a cozy life where we have raised two fine boys into manhood and can appreciate a nice quiet dinner for two - at home - without spending too much money.

We did have our Hallmark moment - we watched a movie afterwards on the Hallmark Channel.

Paraskavedekatriaphobia, Anyone

2009-02-13T08:27:00.012-05:00

I've never had a problem with paraskavedekatriaphobia. In fact, if truth be told, paraskavedekatriaphobia has always been a good day for me.

If you don't know the definition of paraskavedekatriaphobia, don't worry. I didn't either until I looked it up. First, I don't believe in bad luck. Never have. Never will.

I graduated high school on that day in 1975 and for the next 33 years I observed Friday the 13th with reverence. Not anymore.

Yesterday, we had a tornado hit less than a quarter-mile from our house. I was outside at the time assessing the damage from the winds that started during the night. The first thing I heard was the sound of a run-away freight train and then, off to the west saw a 40-foot long aluminum roof fly off a new equipment shed, fly 30 feet up in the air and then crumble onto the ground about 400 feet away (towards me).

Later in the day we heard more wind gusts (they continued, by the way, until early this morning). NOAA had our area under a high wind warning with possible gusts above 65 mph. The agency was right - pretty good considering it doesn't have a cabinet-level secretary running the Commerce Department yet.

And then, this morning we saw what the storm left us:

I fed and watered the birds. The fountain broke and tumbled over
early yesterday and Rich Little, our
Northern Mockingbird, stared at me
like he was giving me the finger.

Danny Kaye, our Red-Bellied Woodpecker was the only bird to stay at the feeder, hanging onto the suet feeder for dear life.

Then came the tiring task of collecting all of the shingles. A few were in the backyard. Several more in our landlord's yard, some in the road in front of the house and even more in neighbor's yards across the road. I even found one a half-mile away.

Once the landlord gets back from his bus run, hopefully we can assess the damage. With potential rain and snow forecast for Valentine's Day I hope we can at least get a tarp on the roof and maybe even repair it today.

A Lot to Catch Up On

2009-02-12T16:37:00.002-05:00

Our Internet has been on the blink for much of the year but really bad for the past three weeks. I finally had enough on Tuesday and called our ISP and found out that our modem doesn't work well with the company's new equipment.

They told me they would give me a new one if I would pick it up. An hour later I had it and PRESTO, we were back to the 21st century.

I will be catching up on everything I wanted to say in the next few days so come back and check it out.

Half-Priced Dinners

2009-01-03T21:28:00.001-05:00

The running joke here in DirtmanLand is that I love to kid SissIggy that she is older than me (in reality, I am exactly six months older). I also kid her when she gets mail from the Social Security Administration and AARP.

A third running gag is she will soon qualify for senior citizen discounts - especially at restaurants - and that I will buy her the things she really wants and need, when I can use the savings from said discounts.

It all came back to bite me one day last week when Sis and I were dining with my parents at the local IHOP on senior citizen night. IHOP, by the way, has good food at regular prices but on those special Mondays, seniors over age 55 get a 50 percent savings and a cup of ice cream too.

The bill came and I forwarded cash to my mother for Sis' and my part of the ticket. She went to pay and commented afterwards that she wasn't charged the right amount. The total bill was around $49 and she had been charged $28 and change.

As mom is always apt to do, she marched right up to the manager and told him he needed to take more of her money. As there was a steady stream of other customers wanting and needing to pay so they could get home in time to watch Big Joe's Polka (on RFDTV).

The manager explained the clerk had rung up the ticket wrong, giving four senior discounts instead of two. So now it seems Sis will get a new pair of slippers 3-1/2 years sooner than I thought.

VT 20, Cincinnatti 7

2009-01-02T00:16:00.008-05:00

To the chagrin of the Heirs I can say with confidence, "We did it".

They, of course, will say that I didn't play a single down but who cares. Virginia Tech finally won a BCS Bowl for the first time in four tries and the team now has won 10 or more games, five years in a row. Only two other BCS teams can say that: Texas and USC, which puts our program in some pretty good company.

The Bearcats entered the game as favorites and that played into the Hokies working-man mentality.

Congrats to coach Beamer and Company and especially to coach Stinespring who may have finally gotten the monkey off his back from alumni unhappy about our offense this season. A big kudo to coach Foster for another outstanding defensive effort.

With any kind of luck, Tech might finish in the top 15 this season and we (there I go again) should be a bonified pre-season Top-10 team next August.

Congrats again, Hokies.

Happy New Year

2009-01-01T00:00:00.000-05:00

Hats off to Google for another nice piece of artwork celebrating the first holiday of 2009. And while I post this on the coldest (19 degrees Fahrenheit), windiest (WNW 24 mph) and first night of the new year, I wish it to be safe and prosperous for everyone who frequents this blog.

What a Way to End the Year

2008-12-31T09:36:00.002-05:00

Yesterday I had the honor of working. And what made it specially nice was I got to work with both Heirs.

That may not seem like much to many of you but it's a known fact business has been slow in the construction industry for some time now. The job was in the woods in the middle of nowhere and was one I originally started back in July.

Since then, I've been waiting for the survey plat, which finally arrived early last week -- when the rains came in deluge form.

Finally, yesterday, the soil was dry enough so we could perform saturated hydraulic conductivity evaluations (Ksats) on two of the proposed onsite sewage disposal system sites I had found this past summer.

That's right. We waited for the soil to dry so we could make it wet again.

The Heirs loaded I's truck with all the equipment and, after traveling to the site, the Heirs carried all the equipment into the woods. Heir I's an old pro at running Ksats having worked for me one summer. He says the Ksats are the best job in the world as he only has to work about 10 seconds every five minutes and can spend the rest of the time playing a mobile video game.

He set up his station and I showed Heir II how to set up the second. My job was to auger the eight borings to the proper depth and watch the Heirs watch the water saturate the soil and make sure everything went smoothly.

It was a long day but as I stated earlier, it was one of the best days I've ever had as I was able to be with my two wonderful sons.

Picking NFL games not as easy as it seems

2008-12-29T23:09:00.000-05:00

In another life I worked part-time as a newspaper sports reporter. Each fall, the staff made predictions on the various high school, local colleges and NFL games. And it seemed, each year I would end up in last place.

One August, Heir II told the sports editor he thought he could do better than me. And that year, Heir II's photo was in my place on the sports page every Friday along with his predictions. Not so surprisingly, when the season was over Heir II found himself in the middle of the pack.

This fall, I decided to come out of retirement and try my hand at predictions of the NFL games with a group of eight men and one woman who frequent a message board run by a guy from Wisconsin.

Once again I started slow and even won a week or two but after the regular season concluded Sunday I found myself in familiar turf -- near the bottom of the pack.

We still have the playoffs to go but at this stage my fight will be with the board's moderator and the nice lady from the midwest who, after a very poor week, found herself dropping three spots to last.

Wish me luck as I try to move up the NFL pick ladder.

Wanna Co-Own a Team Light Forest?

2008-12-29T09:26:00.002-05:00

Just read West Ham is for sale.

Cheap too.

It seems the current owner - Bjorgolfur Gudmundsson, the former chairman and a large shareholder in Iceleand's second largest back - Landsbanki saw the firm seized in October as the worst of the credit crisis tore through the island nation. The failure wiped out his $1.1 billion fortune.

He has since had to put his holding company, Hansa, into voluntary liquidation and the result is the West Ham club is for sale.

It would be the perfect venture for Light Forest and me.

I can do the marketing and he can be the General Manager, head concessionaire and coach.

What a life.

West Ham is a Premier League team, which is exciting in itself but we'd have to relocate to England -- Upton Park in the London suburbs to be more exact. We'd get a few extra amenities though. West Ham has a beautiful stadium, playing at Boleyn Ground and even owns it's own hotel, so SisIggy and Pastry Chef could manage that concern.
We might even be able to put a casino in a back room to satisfy John Boy.

The only downside as I see is we'd have to learn to spell all over again.

So whatda you say Light Forest? Are you interested?

Christmas Eve at Light Forest's

2008-12-24T23:59:00.001-05:00

The family loaded into the trusty Subaru and headed to Light Forest's abode in a sister state late this afternoon for an evening of food, fun and fellowship. Once there the camera was held hostage as the hosts are now shy but we were able to grab some shots of the delectable food including Prime Rib, Country Ham, homemade egg nog and an assortment of cookies made by the Pastry Chef.

Here is a small sample of the goodies:

The Prime Rib was a masterpiece, cooked to perfection by Light Forest. SisIggy, her brothers and her Heirs especially devoured that portion on the left while the Pastry Chef and I are full-heartedly from the right.

John-Boy (he doesn't mind using his real handle) provided
the Junior Johnson-cured country ham. That I knew it was
a NASCAR driver's company didn't bode well in some circles
but Johnson did have a nice product for LF to serve.

We washed it all down with a high-grade homemade egg nog concoction prepared by and in the aforementioned Light Forest's ample kitchen. There were two varieties, one with Jack and the other, generic. I really enjoyed the light version.

The Pastry Chef had friends over earlier in the week for a cookie party. Here are a few examples of the delicacies provided:

We missed getting back home to hear our adorable pets talk at midnight but want our hosts to know that we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves and wish them and you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Finally, the Masterpiece

2008-12-23T09:52:00.007-05:00

Not really. But since I haven't posted for a fortnight, this will have to be one. And, in reality, it is.
You see, Heir 1 and I had a paying job yesterday and that, in itself, makes Monday a good day.

We had a photo job in Fairfax County and this is one of the photos we captured.

The rest of the session wasn't very fruitful -- unless a clogged conveyance line makes you happy. It does us, because after a jetter gets done cleaning it out, we get to go back and do it again (and paid a second time too) :) .

Couple that with the beautiful scenery and the day was breathtaking: 20 degree temps with a breeze out of the west made it a Winnie the Pooh moment.

Here's a pic (if you look really close) of a flock of loons bobbing on the Potomac River with Gunston Cove in the background. The Maryland shore can be seen in the distance but in reality, the actual line is at water's edge.

This one shows the client's boat dock located approximately 70 feet downslope from the rest of the rear yard. The cottage sat on a cliff and the dock was only accessible via a winding staircase to the level below.

And here's one of Fort Belvoir in the distance. I took this one just to show off one of our military bases.

Today, as it is even colder outside (8 degrees this morning), I sit at the computer writing reports and staying warm. Now, I've got to get back to work...

Waiting

2008-12-09T08:10:00.001-05:00

Sorry I haven't posted for awhile but I am working on a masterpiece that's taken more time than I hoped. Besides, I have a real job today...

It Always Comes in Threes

2008-12-04T08:10:00.003-05:00

First it was no water because someone clipped an electrical utility pole in half. It took Dominion Virginia Power almost seven hours to fix.

Next, no water because there was a leak in the cistern. It took the landlord three days to get someone here to fix it.

For the past week or so the kitchen sink would back up whenever we drained the water after washing dishes. I was planning to buy a chemical to unclog it but after talking to my dad, he said to check the P-trap, which I did when I got home Tuesday evening.

The trap literally disintegrated in my hands.

I immediately called Dad. He arrived within the hour and off to Lowes we went for the repair parts.

Unfortunately, the drain baskets also needed replacing and now Lowes was closed.

We scheduled time yesterday afternoon to finish the task and, after two more trips and six more hours, the sink is back to normal.

We also found the real reason for the original problem -- the drain pipe in the basement was completely clogged. It was worse than the suspected cholesterol clog in my arteries; I mean there's no wonder any water was flowing.

We also cleaned the P-trap for the tub while we were at it and now, we believe, there is nothing else that needs to be replaced.

At least that's the thought right now.

Thanks to SisIggy for allowing me to copy her photo of the sink. In all the excitement of the past two days I forgot to snap a single photograph of the escapade.

Birthday clock

2008-12-03T17:21:00.000-05:00

It's time to steal another idea from a friend. Kudos to John from Wisconsin.

WOW Less than a dollar a gallon

2008-12-02T15:53:00.003-05:00

Filled up the old car today and was shocked to see the price: $0.999 a gallon.

Figured you wouldn't believe me so I snapped a photo from my Verizon camera phone. Then, after I got home, it took me the better part of an hour to figure out how to download the pic to the 'puter.

Finagled it somehow and here it is:

Post Thanksgiving Blues

2008-12-01T08:32:00.004-05:00

A great meal at the Darks on Thursday was followed by this*, today:

Now, I feel I can get down to work and start producing. Stay tuned for some great family photos.

*Photo courtesy of John from Wisconsin.

Happy Turkey Day

2008-11-27T08:14:00.003-05:00

Fortunately, the Prez only pardoned Pumkin, leaving Pecan and others like her to the masses.

Sis, Heir I and I will be traveling later this morning to the Darks over in West By God where we'll meet up with John Boy, the Twin Progeny and Heir II, who left yesterday as soon as school was out.

There, the Darks will prepare and we will feast on oysters, a Virginia Salt-cured ham, shrimp, lobster, ribs and maybe even a turkey. Of course, we'll have all the trimmings and trappings too, and later, we will devour Sis's Apple and Pumpkin Pie and then settle down for that old American Futbol standard -- Premier League Soccer.

So for all of my faithful readers (I now have more than Older Sister), may your day be special and remember to give thanks to all the wonderful men and women serving overseas today in foreign lands and especially, have a wonderful

Dark Gets Around

2008-11-26T10:28:00.010-05:00

It's amazing how Dark gets around. His slush fund must still be flush or perhaps it's a hit on all the recent overtime he's put it and the trip was part of much needed R-N-R.

CARSON, CA – November 23 - DC United’s once-favorite fanDark Garden joins in the post-game MLS Championship celebration. Joining Dark on the victory podium are Columbus Crew' Guillermo, Barros Schelotto, Ginos Padula and captain Frankie Hejduk, prior to the presentation of the Philip F.

Anschutz Trophy. Columbus defeated the New York Red Bulls 3-1. Dark promises United will be back in 2009, playing the upstart Seattle Sounders in the title game.

VINDICATED

2008-11-21T11:54:00.008-05:00

If you've been reading SisIggy's blog, you may recall we had water issues earlier in the week. Specifically, whenever Heir I takes a shower, we run out of water. Our water supply is an underground reservoir and we pay a local company $65 to deliver us 1,500 gallons of chlorinated water on a monthly basis. We also have two downspouts that empty into it providing us with water from God.

During the summer -- the drought -- we were having the tank filled with 3,000 gallons every four weeks. In mid-October I opted to have the tank filled to capacity - 4,500 gallons - because you never know when bad weather will hit and the truck won't be able to deliver right away.

Less than 15 days later Heir I was taking and shower and we heard @#$^*( from the bathroom. I called and had a load delivered and our hauler informed me we must have a leak.

Duh.

Four-and-a-half days later Heir I was taking another shower. You know the drill: @#$^* and %%% for good measure came from the bathroom.

Again we called and water was delivered. I then called our landlord and told him we had a leak.

The reservoir repair company arrived this morning and pumped out all that precious water I had bought. After cleaning it they checked for any nook or cranny that may have been causing the problem.

Two areas were found. One, the size of a pin-prick and the other that would have made Old Faithful proud. That was the one I told them about before they started and that's why I feel I am now vindicated.

New water will arrive this afternoon and Heir I can take another shower to test the repair. If we don't hear @#$^*( escaping from the bathroom we'll know the fix was right.

The landlord also informed me that come spring, he's going to hook this house up to his well. Ordinarily, I would think Great. But I have too many memories about another well I once owned that had pump problems every time the wind chill hit the teens and snow was a foot deep.

At least it will be his problem and not mine.

Afterwards, we will have this nice new space underneath the carport:

Heir I has always said he wanted a private bedroom instead of the open space we now call the basement. It may be a little damp - but so is where he sleeps now. I believe we have answered his prayers.

A morning without power, a day without comfort

2008-11-18T12:49:00.008-05:00

I wonder how they did without it in the old days?

Electricity. Can't stand the high cost but can't live without it.

We found that out this morning. Way early this morning.

We awoke to a constant beeping coming from the computer's battery backup. It was still dark outside and SisIggy commented from under the covers: "The electricity must be out. Get up and close the window. We don't want to lose anymore heat from the house."

I did. And noticed it was rather chilly in the house. But not as chilly as it would get.

Heir 2 got up on his own, fumbled in the darkness to dress and wondered aloud why he couldn't run any water from his sink. He wanted to finish a paper he didn't finish last night and wanted to get to school where he could.

I helped him clean the snow off his car (we had about an inch) and then went in search of coffee for Sis. While on the road I saw why we had no power. A crew was replacing a downed pole (I'm blaming it on VDOT who wouldn't sand or salt the road even though the headquarters was less than a stone's throw from the accident scene). I went around it - three miles around it - and got coffee and a donut for my bride.

At 7:30 I called DomVAPower to report the outage and got a recording that all would be fixed by "9:15 am". We waited.

Everything I do is contingent on electricity. Simple things like looking at a clock. Watching Morning Joe or Imus while I drink my coffee (I didn't have any today) and eat my hot breakfast. And, of course, getting on the computer to work, read my three newspapers, check blogs and the weather.

Today of all days I actually had work planned. I needed to research and call in five Ms Utility tickets for work I have planned next week.

And instead, we waited.

I called for an update after 9:15 and found it was now scheduled for 10:15. Additional calls stated 11:15 and 11:45. Power came on around 11:30 -- just long enough to run a liter of water and boot the computer. And then it went dark again. And colder.

Sis was bundled in her sweater, a fleece jacket and her "bum gloves". I had on a jacket and one, two or three pups sitting on my lap.

As soon as the power went out again, I called and found out power would be restored by 1:15pm. Seems the DomVAPower crew broke for lunch. The eat lunch. We can't.

Fortunately, power came back on around 12:30.

I waited 15 minutes just to make sure before I got on the computer to start my day.